Have you ever noticed that no matter where you travel to in the world, your nationality has already been there? It’s all in that moment of silence after you answer the famous number one traveller’s question: “So where are you from”.
Ah…an Italian?! You can almost hear them think “Fiery and signs with both hands even when people are not deaf”. Or in case of the French; “Great kissers, cute accent but careful; yes means no when no means yes”.
Revealing your background can really help someone on how to talk to you. Germans for example are that serious they only laugh about jokes when pointed out one was made. (Just kidding). Clearly nationalistic assumptions are needed to be able to explain actions of others unknown to us. Especially when we travel, we meet so many different people that it is comforting to have clear basics to go on. For example, It is a known fact men and women do not understand each other. (although most women assume they are the one exception to this rule). This can be a scary thought, especially when you are assessing your chances, with a certain individual. Once again nationalities can be a great source of information.
According to the expert opinions stated during my travels; it was the English bird who invented wining, and not the Italian girls who started shaving. American chicks are spoilt by daddy and Thai ladies are extremely fond of dogs. Quite recently it has been discovered that all Middle Eastern women have bellies with sensual flexibility. I personally find it fascinating how much we already know about men and women on a global level. Like to us women a Frenchmen equals sexy accent. Italians make passionate love to the spoken word and English or Irish chaps to their beer. A good Latin lover lives in a squat without water and an Aussie shows his affection by sharing his crocodile meat. Scottish men will steal your best skirt and oh yes, less we forget the famous size of an African men’s…eh…rhythm.
Strange then that we are still interested in meeting an individual. Isn’t it much easier to assume that if one person does something the rest of his people will follow? That is what the world of politics advises us to do. According to the assumptions that come with my nationality I am a tall, sex craved, independent stripper who tolerates any straight forward man on drugs as long as he brings me tulips. And to think I was worried about first impressions…
In our next issue